Grab a cup of coffee and settle in for my story.
The new year started with enlisting in the military on January 3, 2026. Well, I didn’t know it was the military, I thought I was signing up to attend pug camp, but there are rules and exercise schedules, and even demerits for what the high command refers to as “non approved behaviors”, so I think I might be in boot camp instead of a retreat. The drill sergeant will tell you that what I lack in manners, I make up for in personality. My name is Griffin and I’m an 8-year-old, 26-pound pug boy looking for my forever home once I complete basic training.
I have aspirations of graduating in the top 62% of my class. For starters, I’m a member of the clean bowl club in the mess hall. I also have the endurance of a 3-year-old pug when it comes to my activity level. I feel my best if I get 2 or 3 one-mile walks per day. When indoors, I enjoy taking hostages — stuffed lambs and ducks are perfect victims. If there is activity outside, I will bark to alert the people of the potential enemy threat. I feel fully prepared for future drills and know I will make a fine soldier. If the 11-year-old resident pug that sleeps half the day can get promoted, I know I can too. He must have a high rank because I hear the humans referring to him as Lieutenant Dan. We also have GI Jane. She’s career military and nobody messes with her. I choose to lay on the floor if she’s occupying the dog bed. I am an officer and a gentleman, but I wish I had more playful recruits in place of Lieutenant Dan and GI Jane.
Before enlisting, I lived with a 6-year-old pug, Beans, who successfully entered pug camp instead of the detoured route of the military. Our prior owner worked long hours and wanted us to have fulfilled lives with more stimulation in our day. When I am unsupervised and bored, I can become a bit destructive and have been known to scratch a door or wall. The military is working with me and keeping me occupied most of the time. All I want is your attention.
I passed my medical entrance exam – no problem. It’s important for you to clean my wrinkles daily. I have a cyst on my belly that the MASH unit aspirated and found to be liquid filled. It doesn’t cause a problem but if it decides to grow, it should be removed. The military dentist tells me I could do better with oral hygiene, and down the road a dental cleaning might be something for my future adopter to consider, especially if you allow me to sleep in the person bed. I have stelthfully crept into the person bedroom at night here at the barracks, but the drill sergeant directed me back to Lieutenant Dan and GI Jane on the sofa. I’m hopeful my forever family will feel otherwise and allow human bedroom privileges.
My charismatic nature tends to win hearts of all people I meet. There are no junior recruits here, but since I wag at all people, I’d likely welcome the company of all humans, 5 years and older. I am a robust, muscular cadet, a bit taller than the average pug, who sometimes jumps with enthusiasm, so wee tots are probably not the best fit for a sturdy guy like me. I do not require a fenced yard, but I’d love a secure outdoor space, or dog park to safely romp and play on a regular basis & work off my energy. In the past, I was overweight, so exercise and a healthy diet is ultra important to keep me feeling my best.
My playful personality is my best attribute. I’m also a champion snuggler. A true Velcro dog. I prefer to lay on your lap but will happily rest by your side as well. If you work from home, I will happily rest in the dog bed by your feet. If I want to go for a walk, I will gently nudge your leg with my chin. When we have down time in the platoon, I enjoy playing fetch and gambling at card games. Pleasure walks and being outdoors are high on my priority list as long as you don’t mind me taking the lead. As a trained soldier, my eyes are always alert for potential threats. There is an albino squirrel around my barracks who I’m convinced is an enemy decoy. As your protector, I must remain always alert and always vigilant. I know commands: sit, wait, no (with a finger wave) and will come when you call me by name. I want to please my person.
As for my demerits, I have but only a few. No pug is perfect, even within the highly structured military. To be completely forthcoming, I am a loud barker. The drill sergeant uses a spray bottle to help correct this behavior. The high command and their neighbors know my name. They have introduced me to the bark collar when on my outdoor drills and pleasure walks. Humans do not fully appreciate my always vigilant nature when it pertains to the decoy squirrel or trespasser dogs. I’m also working on my bathroom habits. In this area, I am a work in progress, and possibly the reason I won’t graduate with honors. Luckily there are belly bands to assist in my training and patient people who will more than occasionally wake up to an indoor BM. Fortunately, I have found the potty pad at least 25% of the time. I may need continued training in this area, but improvement has been noted on my official record.
My discharge from boot camp is dependent on a successful forever home placement. Ideally, I’d like to live with a family who can give me a lot of attention and prevent boredom from setting in. I’d also enjoy a laid back, but playful dog in my forever home, one who doesn’t mind my occasional lack of manners, preferably no career military dogs like GI Jane. And it’s important to have neighbors far enough away who don’t mind my sometimes-loud barking. Most of all, my future goals include wagging my tail, taking walks, playing with people and dogs, and staying active. Your attention and affection much of the day will check all the boxes on my military report card.
If you would like to adopt this soon-to-be military graduate, apply to S.N.O.R.T. today, for me, Griffin. (You may call me Griffy).
